I am going to start filtering some of my more private musings. Since blogger does not have a tool for that, you will need to visit my Live Journal and ask to be friended there. I will continue to post Daily Gratitude and other subjects here. There is also a FAQ for my Journal at the same link.
| Saturday, March 09, 2002 @ 00:40 I discovered this morning that the web server crash earlier this week ate some of the files on DM's Realm. I'll have to check both it and this site to restore whatever got lost. It'll be a time consuming task, so I may not get finished til Sunday. I've spent a lot of time talking to bois lately. I'm finding myself questioning things I used to accept blindly. As I told j tonight, if it seems like it's a logical explanation, I tend to accept it at face value. Then I'll go through hypercritical phases where I tear everything apart and reassemble it. I remember the day I stopped and said "what do you mean submission is a gift?" Now I'm coming to a greater understanding of my own view of ownership and how far it is from the "TPE slavery" that I used to accept as the only way to achieve ownership. Whether the subject is internal enslavement, TPE slavery, or M/s, there seems to be an emphasis on the relationship creating ownership. That through love, one is enslaved to a dominant. That's not how I see ownership. The relationship is structured around the owner/owned dynamic. The structure comes first. Love comes after the ownership, if it comes at all. I finally came up with a pretty good explanation of how I define love within the context of ownership. However, I'm too tired at the moment to look up the log. I'll find it later and paste it. I'm sure it will raise some eyebrows -- or maybe it will finally click for some people just what I mean when I say I'm not looking for a partner.
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