I am going to start filtering some of my more private musings. Since blogger does not have a tool for that, you will need to visit my Live Journal and ask to be friended there. I will continue to post Daily Gratitude and other subjects here. There is also a FAQ for my Journal at the same link.
| Thursday, May 08, 2003 @ 07:00 written 5/7/03 at 1:25 pm during my lunch break at work: A few weeks ago I started idly playing with combining my last name with that of my slave. When he saw the notes, he asked if this is what our name will be. A simple question that still jars me on a daily basis. When our negotiations of a limited D/s relationship turned into the voluntary surrender resulting in ownership, my right to change his name was discussed -- as was his love-hate relationship with his current name. In fact, we'd both planned to change our legal monikers long before we got together. It made sense that in surrenduring to me, the right to name him was included. So, why does the assumption inherent in the question above bother me? Maybe it's because I watch him struggle with surrender on a daily basis -- placing value judgements on his own actions and measuring them against some vague standard of slave perfection. I haven't asked for slave perfection, just honest surrrender. It's the little, unheralded examples of this sincere trust that catch my breath and interrupt my mental and emotional flow - prove my ownership. Maybe I don't enforce formal behaviors or disciplines, but I inspire innocent, unyeilding trust in some significant, and unexpected ways. That is the heart of my Mastery of him.
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