x
"When you open your mind and hands and heart to the knowing of a thing, there is no room in you for fear"
--Patricia McKillip, The Riddle-Master of Hed |
I am going to start filtering some of my more private musings. Since blogger does not have a tool for that, you will need to visit my Live Journal and ask to be friended there. I will continue to post Daily Gratitude and other subjects here.
There is also a FAQ for my Journal at the same link.
the small decisions
Saturday, August 09, 2003
@ 14:40
One of the toughest parts of being the Master in a relationship is the small decisions. In the scheme of things, it won't matter a year from now, let alone ten years from now, what decision I make. Then again, our immediate emotional health and th eenrgy we choose to put out into the universe will. So where's the balance?
I have, literally, less than $2 in my bank account until my next paycheck -- and this is if I don't pay three bills that are due, choosing to eat the late fees rather than dip into my overdraft account. To attend the party tonight would cost $2 for us to walk through the door, a few dollars to buy a share food, and might use up what little gas is remaining in our tank.
Not going to the party would cut us off from a chance to relax and hang out with friends. There's also always the possibility of getting to scene with people outside our relationship. Lastly, to go out would show our faith that our situation is temporary, that we've taken steps to get things under control in the near future and that spending a few dollars is worth an enjoyable evening out.
And now there's stress about boy's unemployment appeal and how much more money we'll owe if he doesn't win it. Will spending money to alleviate stress actually increase the stress later in the week? Yes, we could stay home and swim and play harder than we could in public and that would relieve stress.
Maybe I'll just toss a coin and trust the universe, since, in the long run, this sort of decision is miniscule.
|
|
|
|