I am going to start filtering some of my more private musings. Since blogger does not have a tool for that, you will need to visit my Live Journal and ask to be friended there. I will continue to post Daily Gratitude and other subjects here. There is also a FAQ for my Journal at the same link.
the power of names
| Saturday, July 17, 2004 @ 14:52 Only one person responded to my request for input on the future of my websites (Thank you, danae!). As a result, I've been shuffling options around in my head for weeks now. It's not a constant thing, because I didn't want to give too much energy to the confusion. I just let it all simmer in the back of my mind until an answer was ready to present itself. Earlier today, in the shower, it happened. DM's Realm is supposed to be about me. Originally it was to be about my life in the world of bdsm, M/s, and leather. It seems simple enough, however, to expand that to the other realms of my life: vegetarianism, spirituality, pets, family, personal history, art & popular culture. Those elements certainly affect the whole of who I am. They even affect the SM and M/s aspects of my life (like the time I f***ed boy's ass while watching "The Music Man" and the fact that I don't purchase leather implements). Expanding DM's Realm to include the pages currently on Unsuspected Depth would make logical, wholistic sense. Then the epiphany happened. I have an attachment to the phrase "Unsuspected Depth" due to the association with one of my favorite movies, The Philadelphia Story. Reflecting on my attachment, I realized that I don't want to surprise people and that's what that phrase evokes. I don't want people to see me one way and then, later, if they're lucky, realize that there are all these hidden aspects to me. I want to live an authentic and honest life where what you see is what you get. I don't want people to feel they are missing pieces of who I am or that, since they can't see beyond the surface, they can't depend on what they will find underneath. Unsuspected Depth doesn't suit my purpose in maintaining a internet presence. I relayed this ephiphany to boy and he commented that Unsuspected Depth is who I used to be. And, as difficult as that is to admit, he's right. A few years ago I was working for a religious organization and incapable of revealing anyof the real me to my co-workers. I had just spent years living with my mother (which also required a large amount of subterfuge) and was still learning that it was okay to be fully myself in my own home. I was transplanted to a new city and a new bdsm community --one that has an actual leather community as well as the "pansexual bdsm" groups--and was trying to find my place, very cautiously. I felt a need to define myself with specific labels so that people could have a starting place for knowing me. I figured they could get to the deeper me later. I liked being the surprise, the mystery, revealing unsuspected depths to people. That isn't who I am now. What this means is that I will be reworking my websites. The domain name www.unsuspecteddepth.com will expire in the next week. I will slowly transfer the sections of that site to new sections of www.dmsrealm.com. This journal, since it is hosted by blogspot, will not change url anytime soon, so don't panic. It will change a little in format, to blend better with DM's Realm style. However, if you have links to archives of the journal or other pages on Unsuspected Depth, they will change in the next few weeks. I will publish updates on the transition in this journal. I have spent past few days playing with names for boy's chef services company and for a name for him to use when in top space ("Sir slave boy" just seems odd). Since I've been in the naming space, I guess it bled over to my problem of what to do with the domains. Once I looked at the actual names of my sites, rather than the arguments involved, the confusion I've felt for weeks melted away.
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