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"When you open your mind and hands and heart to the knowing of a thing, there is no room in you for fear"
--Patricia McKillip, The Riddle-Master of Hed |
I am going to start filtering some of my more private musings. Since blogger does not have a tool for that, you will need to visit my Live Journal and ask to be friended there. I will continue to post Daily Gratitude and other subjects here.
There is also a FAQ for my Journal at the same link.
goals
Sunday, May 22, 2005
@ 13:13
I have been reading The Practical Dreamer's Handbook: Finding the Time, Money, and Energy to Live the Life You Want to Live by Paul & Sarah Edwards. It's mostly things I already know, but seeing it organized with extensive examples of the steps in action has been illuminating. I've skimmed the book once for depth and took notes. That's how I decided I wanted to check it out from the library. Right now, I'm reading it through for meaning and reaction. Ideally, I'll go on to use it as a true handbook: doing the "exercises" and incorporating the tips and advice into creating the life I want for my household.
As I read, I'm reminded of all the various goals I have and how do I choose which are important--which are tasks I want to complete, which are dreams I want to create, and which are just fantasies I like to use to pass the time. I'm also becoming more aware of how every choice I make, from something as simple as whether or not to buy ice cream at the grocery store to deciding to put my active job search on hold for two weeks, creates the fabric of my life. While I want to stay focused in each moment as it happens, I also need to be mindful of how the choice of the moment creates the next moment -- or the moment two months from now.
Here is a brainstorm of the goals I currently hold. I'm doing this as a personal exercise, so there's no editing or ranking, just free flowing thoughts. (OK, I admit I'll copy edit for spelling and grammar before I post.):
- I want to finish The Practical Dreamer's Handbook this week.
- I want to start posting The Right Questions: Ten Essential Questions to Guide You to an Extraordinary Life in my Spirituality Journal and discuss what each means to me.
- I want to read the five books I have checked out from the library before they are due.
- I want to start walking through our neighborhood 3 times a week, both for exercise and to enjoy the place I live.
- I want to read the shelves full of books I've collected over the years and haven't opened yet.
- I want to find or create a job that is flexible, challenging, in balance with who I am as a person and provides opportunities for me to be creative in a healthy, open, geographically-desirable environment that compensates me for my worth as a working professional rather than some arbitrary scale of what people are "supposed" to earn.
- I want to find the slave who is meant to complete my triad.
- I want to find any other slaves/bottoms who will be part of my extended household and leather family.
- I want to present our developing seminar at APEX this fall.
- I want to create a support network to supplement said seminar.
- I want to throw a successful 10th Anniversary Party for the Arizona Amazons.
- I want to donate items that we didn't sell at our yard sale to women's shelters and hospitals.
- I want to "freecycle" some of the other items.
- I want to write a book that is published and actually sells copies.
- I want to go on the road with boy and our third and live the nomadic life that is my heritage.
- I want to own an African Grey.
- I want to write three more books.
- I want to create a website that chronicles boy's life on the road.
- I want to compete for International Master and slave (NOT THIS YEAR!)
- I want to do some voice training with boy.
- I want to incorporate a stronger protocol structure in my household.
- I want to pay off my student loans.
- I want to pay off all mine and boy's credit cards.
- I want to go back to school.
- I want to help develop boy's cooking courses and market him to the service-oriented bdsm/leather community.
- I want to develop boy's personal chef career.
- I want to encourage boy in his poetry and performance art.
- I want to create a collage piece for our living room using a large glass tabletop boy rescued from the trash last year.
- I want to create collage bookmarks with lifestyle themes to market at events.
- I want to create artist trading cards using collage techniques.
- I want to create bookmarks that feature boy's poetry and market those.
- I want to stop eating so much sugar, corn syrup, and fried foods.
- I want to maintain a healthier sleep schedule in my household.
- I want to find a housemate who is leather/bdsm (-friendly), pagan (-friendly), doesn't drink or do drugs, queer (-friendly), loves cats, doesn't have children, dogs, or birds, has similiar hobbies and pop culture interests, and wants to interact as a family member rather than a boarder.
- I want to figure out how to make the best use of our "great room" and then do it.
- I want to host regular play parties in our home.
- I want to get a laptop with a dock to be my main computer.
- I want to finish the newest version of my website and then keep it updated.
- I want to spend more time with friends instead of waiting to bump into them at meetings.
- I want to develop a "play" relationship with c.
- I want to scene/top c1 and sm.
- I want to clear more of the "stuff" from our house and from our schedules.
- I want "Wonderfalls", "DS9", and "Angel" on DVD (all seasons).
- I want to find/create artwork for my bedroom.
- I want to take boy to Ms World Leather this year.
- I want to enjoy our backyard at least once a week -- regardless of heat.
- I want to purchase a new comforter set for our new bed.
- I want to buy attractive interview clothes that don't make me look like a lump or frump.
- I want to get as much as I can out of my outplacement services in terms of career assessment and developing my skills without being co-opted into the mainstream ideals of what working life "should" be.
- I want to read all the books I've ever put on a "to read" list.
- I want to form/join a book club that reflects my ecclectic tastes.
- I want to create collages without a goal -- simply to see something I imagine become reality.
- I want to write journal entries/website essays about the following:
- the permanence of art
- petitions vs. contracts
- gratifications vs. happiness
- household structure
- anniversaries
- I want to write an article for the APEX newsletter on the importance of names and naming.
- I want to create a manual for my household that includes a mission statement, goals, rights and responsibilities of members, standing rules and protocols, and outlines the process for someone to join the household or become an extended family member.
- I want to offer "family member" status to several dear friends once I complete my "manual".
- I want to mark boy in some permanent or semi-permanent(piercings can always heal over and tattoos can be removed) way.
- I want to develop a national/international network of females whose primary identity is "Master."
- I want to elimate every box, file, drawer, and crate that is designated "to be filed" or "to be sorted" in my house.
- I want to learn to meditate.
- I want to continue to maintain my handwritten journal of daily activities that has replaced Virgo Musings.
- I want to become more in tune with my psychic abilities.
- I want to explore the power of the Mayan Oracle cards.
- I want to write about my spiritual path more -- perhaps even in books.
I could, of course, come up with a list twice as long, but I need to take a break from the computer and eat some lunch and perhaps read some more. I plan to use this list in conjunction with The Practical Dreamer's Handbook, my outplacement workshops, and discussions with boy to plan the next phases of my life. It's definitely time to start moving "fantasy" into "dream" so that it can one day become "reality" --whatever *that* word means.
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